Justified and Ancient Mummus?

Hmmm. Hmmm.

~~~

I keep waiting for Beck to interrupt his stream of good, but ultimately insubstantial party albums with one that is more befitting his talents. Now he's put out a song in a similar vein to recent efforts, if weaker, but the strong point is the film clip - a series of images demonstrating U.S. consumerism in all its vastness. I've seen it all before, but maybe it takes something like this to reach more than the usual suspects, and jog them out of their collective stupor.




~~~

I am falling so far down the hamster hole. I look up. I look around me. It's dark. I'm drenched in fear. I'm covered in sweat. I continue to fall and then with a thud I put my hand in my pocket. I pull out my apple core and hurl it downwards, that I might hear a tock and gauge how far below the floor is. I throw it and hear nothing. Still nothing. Still nothing. And then I hear a sound so hideous, so mortifying, so primal that it chills me to my core. It is the sound of my apple core hitting the ground. All up I'd say it took about a tenth of a second, which means that I too will hit the ground in a tenth of a second or so.

Recounting this tale, it still makes my hair stand on end. I can "see" the hamster hole. I can still "taste" the bitter potion that Ladbrook gave me in exchange for a hunge. It took me three long weeks to recover from the ordeal, and if I wasn't on leave at the time I probably would have been fired. You see, I was utterly incapable of calling my employer and telling them of my predicament. Of course, now I'm better. That's what my daughter's high school sweetheart tells me anyway.

The reason I'm writing this is that I need your help. People don't realise that there are many more hamster holes. Upwards of 250,000 in fact. And each one poses a real threat to our national security. Densely populated with treefrogs and camomile, they represent a penny drop of momentous proportions. And yet eight letters to Local and State MPs have been ignored, replied in name but not substance. Let me quote you one:

Dear Master Gee (if that is your 'real' name),

Thank you for your correspondence, dated -2 February 2018, concerning hamster holes and discounts of upwards of 40%.

I share your concern for Australia's security. Sadly, as you are not a member of my electorate, your letter has been shredded and stored for posterity. I thank you for your interest, and commend the following websites to you: http://flickr.com, http://abs.gov.au.

I trust you have enjoyed this little exemplar of democracy in action, ya prick.

Yours sincerely,

The Hon. Born Pab

What a fool! And people wonder why society will shortly crumble.

So my dear reader, this is what I ask of you, should you choose to take on this noble and ponderous task. Stand up and call out to the heavens "You b free, you n me, taking on the world with a gin and some verve! You b free, for all eternity, taking on the planet with a packet of crisps!". It's my theory - and I'm yet to tabulate the remaning data - that if at least a billion people do this, we will instantaneously break the shackles of modern society that blind and block us at every turn. It's pretty obvious that after that there'd be some real opportunities and possibilities for personal growth. On the other hand. if just a couple of people do it, results would be less transformative.

If I have failed to convince you, perhaps these words from a famous guitarist will do the trick. For now, see you later :)

"Hendrix was a perfect guitarist. That's all I wanted to do as a kid. Play a guitar properly and jump around. But too many people got in the way." Syd Barrett

~~~

I'm trying to put some power chords to this sweet verse I just came up with.

You've returned it to meeeee
But iiiiiii did not want it back
Now my life has some prooooooblems
Better call Fortinbras